The Big But (A minor interlude)

"Alas for maiden, alas for judge, rich repeiner and household drudge, God pity them both and pity us all ... for of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these:  It might have been."
-John Greenleaf Whittier

I know, I know…you are waiting to hear what happens to me and H. next…its coming but I had to do this one first.

As I near the end of my assignment, I find myself somewhat reflective on the last year and what’s happened.

When I decided to come to the Sollies more than a year ago, everyone I told said pretty much the same thing:

“Man, I would love to do that but…”

There were Buts all over the place.  I’ve got a mortgage, I’ve a kid or a dog or cat or a mom or an ingrown toe nail.  I’m saving for my car, my I-Mac or I’m in prison…whatever I heard it all. 

And here is what I have to say to all to the Buts:

I’m not particularly smart. Or sexy. Or funny. Or beautiful. Or talented.  Or rich. I just got off my Buts.  Cause life ain’t no dress rehearsal, people.  If you want something, you gotta grab it and fight for it.  Because if I can do this great adventure I am POSITIVE that you can do anything. 

Sorry it may sound self righteous or you might say to yourself “But, Sara, you’ve had sooo many opportunities that others haven’t, like access to education and good parents…”.  And you know what? You are spot on. You bet your balls I’ve been lucky.  I have awesome parents who supported my education and career every step of the way.  I’ve been very fortunate in this life to have had great friends, partners, mentors bosses and amazing jobs working for kick ass organizations. I mean it hasn't always been a cake walk and sure I've got my down days but overall I’m grateful for each wonderful, blissful moment of my life.

Having said that, it’s still no excuse, eh. And here is why I’m writing this: I’m tired from hearing excuses from people who feel they can’t get what they want in life and would rather whine and sulk then get off their But. 

If you don't think you can change your life and think I'm an over privileged bad example, consider my friend D. My favorite inspiration person here in the Sollies, D., who walked away from an abusive marriage that started at AGE 13 to self fund her way through university to become an amazing advocate for education in the Sollies. Her life was surrounded by Buts: she had six kids, no money, no parental support. She had nothing but she did something, built herself up to HELP OTHERS.  She is my hero because she made her life HAPPEN. She got her BUTs.  She is a humbling example to me, when I am lazy or self indulgent (which is more often than I would care to admit), to pull up my socks and get back to work. 

If this woman, who had to deal with extreme abuse, poverty, and sexism could fight through and make stuff happen in her life, so can you.

I also got the "its the wrong time" thing too.  Guess what? There will never be a sign from the heavens telling you it is a good time.  Sometimes, you gotta jump,bad timing and all and hope for the best. Now, don't get me wrong. If you are happy and content with living your life cruising along, that's awesome for you.  My crazy life certainly isn't for everybody and everyone has the right to enjoy their life on their own terms.  I support anyone who is living life with joy and pride in what they do.  What I'm trying to say is to those people who are holding themselves back from what they really want in life is just get off you But and do it.

You think my life is cool? Awesome.  I think it’s pretty cool too, in fact I wouldn’t change anything about it.  Guess what? I know you can do better than me.  Well, maybe you won’t rock the ginger curls and red crocodile stilettos like I do, but whatever.  

So next time you hear your But start looking for another way, cause believe me, anything is possible with your life.    

Just sayin.